It's New Year!!!!

“Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” Dale Carnegie

I suppose that I should have posted this sooner, but unfortunately we were dealing with the death of my husband's Grandpa Dick Thorson.  I was very lucky to have met him and our daughter was equally blessed to have her Great-Grandpa Dick around.  He was 93 and a funny, funny man!!! Not only that, but he was a Pearl Harbor survivor and a jack of all trades.  I will really miss hearing him say when we would see him, "Ruthie (his wife), get them some of those cookies!".  He also was forever handing out candy and sometimes you would find it in your pocket where he had put it.  In fact, Chloe's first piece of candy ever was from him.  He will be missed!

Now to shift gears... I tend to not have resolutions per se.  I think goals are more appropriate, so this year I have a few things that I am going to do:
1. Run 3 5Ks which I have already signed up for.
2. Make more time for myself and learn to say, "NO" more often.
3. Finish my doctoral coursework.
4. Work on my relationship with my immediate family.

I also have decided that maybe I have been "too" good of a friend, meaning that I drop everything for the people I care about, at risk of being walked all over.  I am a strong person, but I also am very sensitive to the needs of others, which in turn can also be a bad thing.  Meaning that I care deeply for the people who are in my life, but I have often found that sometimes I care more for them, than they care for me.  Last year was about learning who my true friends were, this year will be more about creating healthy boundaries at the risk of having to end friendships again as well. It is disappointing and frustrating, but sometimes it has to be done. I have decided that I will still be gracious and nice, but I will no longer be a pushover.  Time and time again, I have made the effort only to have people not return the favor.  Am I angry? No... I am just very disappointed in the fact that I take friendships seriously but others don't.

However, the flip side is this:  I am also extremely busy, so there are times when I also don't call or talk to people as much as I have in the past.  This does not mean that I don't think about people on a regular basis, but with my crazy life, I can't always be as involved as some think I should be.  This is mostly due to the fact that I: have a full time job that requires me to teach and manage a program, have a family including an almost 3 year old, am a military spouse with a husband who has command of a unit (which makes me somewhat required to show up to social events, etc.), and to top it off, I have church obligations and my own education to deal with while running a household and commuting to work an hour each way, each day.... OH and I also give piano lessons!  However, I would hate to NOT be busy either!!! :) I guess I figure, and maybe somewhat naively, that people who know me, know that and understand.  Perhaps I am giving people too much credit?  Who knows, but I am doing what is best for me right now and as long as I can live with the decision(s) I have made or making, it's all gravy!

Now for some more interesting news... The last few months, I have had a few panic attacks.  Kinda weird because I did not have them before.  Either that, or I am more in tune with my body and I notice it now.  Not quite sure, but on any account, I visited my doctor about.  I have also noticed that since I have more energy, my crazy/hyper ADHD tendencies have been amplified.  My theory is that since my metabolism is faster and I have more energy, my hyperactivity is back in full swing.  I believe this is due to the fact that when I was obese, everything was slower including me, and now that I have lost almost 1/2 my weight, those tendencies are back with a vengeance.  When I was younger I was on meds and I had learned coping strategies for certain aspects, but never the energy aspect because it is also a personality trait.  So what am I doing to deal with this?  I believe that the panic attacks are a result of the ADHD.  I had episodes like that when I was a kid and I had no clue what they were, but being more knowledgeable, I know what they are now.  Lately, I was trying to run off the excess energy like I did when I was a kid, but instead, I over did it and my knees and ankles are rebelling.  So, I did what any health care professional would do... I made an appointment with my doctor to talk about this.

The result is that I am going back to old coping mechanisms, mainly piano and physical activity with the addition of a low dose ADHD med.  This worked for me in the past and I have to say that since starting the meds, I feel more focused and less frantic or panicky.  We agreed to treat that first and then see if it lessened the panic attacks.  So far, so good!  I also have had some environmental changes which have not been conducive to my ADHDmeds for ADHD, but with that said, I am doing what has worked for me in the past.  I have tried natural remedies as well, but this by far has been the best FOR ME...

Now for the encouragement for the New Year... Set goals and for those of you looking for an inexpensive way to exercise, please consider joining http://coreconditioningtraining.com, which is an online workout site that is owned by my friend Ali and her husband Mark.  It is an easy inexpensive way to exercise at home.  I will admit that this week, I haven't been logging in as often due to the death in our family, but that coupled with From the Couch to 5K, have really motivated me to be my best.  Another great app that I rave about, is My Fitness Pal.  I love it because I can track what I am eating, very easily!!! I know that I really appreciate the accountability factor of the three of those combined with my running pals!

I also encourage you to make sure that you are taking a multivitamin a day and other supplements as your doctor sees fit.  I use a prenatal multivit, biotin, Vit. A, B complex,  Vit. D, biotin, Calcium carbonate with D, and of course of my B12 coupled with a protein shake in the morning.  I do my biweekly B12 injections and take my ADHD med along with my PRN muscle relaxer.  This is much different than my old regimen of Savella (for fibromyalgia), multivit, muscle relaxer (daily), and blood pressure medication.  I pay for three months in vitamin at the Vitamin Shoppe, what I paid one month in medication alone.  As per usual, talk with your physician before you exercise or change your medication regimen or add vitamins.

From a dietary standpoint, I do a lot of protein shakes due to the GBS.  They fill me up and keep me going.  That along with my water or protein water intake has really made a difference in how I look at feel. I limit my snacks and when I do eat them, I do not eat processed foods. It was VERY hard during the holidays but I made it!!! And thankfully, many people were willing to give me some ideas when I realized during Thanksgiving, that I hadn't really prepared myself for holiday eating!

I want to leave you with a thought or two.  This time last year, I never would have thought that I would be at this point physically.  I would have laughed at you if you had told me I would be.  I spent many days and nights lamenting to my husband and best friend, about how much I hated being fat and I just needed one person to believe in me that I could do it.  I found that I didn't need other people to believe in me, as much as I needed to believe in myself and my ability to do the right thing for me and my body.  So even though we fall or fail sometimes, true character is shown when after we fall or fail, we get up and try again!  So if you have fallen, dust yourself off and try again.  If you are succeeding, then pay it forward and share your tips and accomplishments to aid them in their journey.  I look forward to seeing you all here in 2012 and hearing about all you have done!!!! :)