Is Food Your Friend?

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.  ~Doug Larson 

I was having this conversation with a friend of mine who is on a weight loss journey of her own and my sister.  The title comes from a question that my sister was asked at one time in her life.  It is a bit amusing but it can be a valid question... Unfortunately to many, food is an enemy.

I have never really had a problem eating at least not in regards to anorexia or bulimia.  Most of my issues with food revolved around being criticized for exactly what I put in my mouth.  I got to the point that I refused to eat around anyone, including family.  I was content to eat alone (when I did eat), to prevent the comments that were sure to come. Even when I was 125 pounds, I had at least one person in my life trying to tell me what to eat and it bugged me to no end.  When I was younger, I quit eating all together with my family in an attempt to squash criticism, but all that got me was a trip to a counselor because people thought that I was anorexic (yeah right).  But this truly began my issue with eating in front of people.

When I was bigger, I had a "friend" that would criticize what I ate.  And not just to me, but to other people.  The kicker is this:  even when I was almost 100lbs heavier than I am now, I did eat healthy foods and actually smaller amounts than most people.  Being the fact that I am stubborn, I would just eat to irritate this person and of course, in the long run it hurt me more than them.  My ex was like this too.  He would criticize me, but he would turn around and eat fast food and then tell me how I needed to not eat it.  Can we say Hypocrite?

When I was going through the prep for my surgery, I was required to speak with a counselor and take various assessments.  I know some of you are going to be sorely disappointed, but I am surprisingly normal and I had no mental illness or psychosis.  In fact, I am pretty boring and not that great of a case study.  On any account, those tests didn't pinpoint something that I figured out pretty fast when I had the surgery.  In some ways, I was obsessed with food.

I grew up in the South where LIFE revolves around food.  You do something good, Mother fixes a special dinner. You do something bad, there is still a ton of food.  You die, they bring food.  You are born, they bring food.  You beat someone up, they.... Just kidding.  But food is life and life is food down home.  And add the fact that my GreatGrandfather owned grocery stores and my favorite place to visit as a kid at my maternal Grandparents' was the Donut Shoppe.  And for good measure, let me mention that I was named after a donut shop... Yep, Amy Joy's Dunkin Donuts (in St. Louis)... Needless to say, I was doomed!!!

Now let's add in a twist... My parents are health nuts... and kind of freakish.  But that is what happens when a majority of their relatives have died from loving food, like bacon, lard, fatback, fried everything, biscuits, topped with real butter and whole milk... My dad is also a scientist and used to tell us what food did to you etc. So growing up, with allergies and weird health kicks, I personally started to eat whatever when I was out of the house (in college).  There is seriously only so much millet, kale, okra, Wasa, lecithin, and soy milk a person can take before Twinkies start to look like manna!!!! 

On any account, my parents taught all of us to eat well, but we also learned some bad habits.  Specifically, obsessing about food.  I remember dreaming about food when I was kid... weird but true... I think I heard more about what I could NOT eat instead of what I could eat.  In my undergrad communications classes in college, I learned that our brains do not differentiate between DO and DO NOT.  So when you tell someone, "Don't think about food"... what do you think they do?  This has been eye opening to me because now that I have a stomach the size of a walnut.  I think about food differently than in the past.

I don't think about it in the same way.  I think more about:

Can my stomach handle this?
If I eat this, will I throw up?
How many protein grams are in this?
Do I want to blow my measly 500calories on something that won't even stay down?
Do I want to have dumping syndrome if I eat this?
Will this cause me to retain water and then cause my weight to fluctuate?
How can get enough protein in today without making myself sick?
Will have enough time to get my water intake in today?
Those look good, but are they worth how I am going to feel after I eat them?
I'll just lick it... Licking won't cause me to consume too many calories will it?


I kind of mentioned the above things in a tongue and cheek manner, but I do deal with these thoughts daily.  One thing that I mention time and time again is that I don't eat for pleasure anymore... I eat to fuel my body and that is about it.  Mostly because it isn't fun to eat when you have to get so technical about it. And to be honest, I am glad that I do get technical about it!!! I chose GBS so that I would think about these things and so that my body would use a negative feedback loop to reinforce this. I will say though, I don't obsess.  In fact, people give me grief for always being busy, but when you are busy, you don't have time to think about things like food.  I also tend to drink more water and exercise more.  I just started training three days a week to do a 5K in about 3 months.

Back to food being your friend... Food can be your friend and help, much like a friend can, without being an obsession.  Look at it this way, if you had a good friend who stalked you, you probably wouldn't consider them a friend, but more of a nutcase.  Food is that way... It is designed to maintain homeostasis and all the inner workings of your anatomy and physiology.  Yes, it's ok that it tastes good, but if you overwhelmed a friend like we sometimes do our bodies with food, they would probably hide out when you came to visit or quit calling you.  Let food be your friend, but don't let it be your obsession!!! Easy to say, but much more difficult to process. I do know this!

I also would say that if you are a parent, don't obsess because your kids will see that and may also start to obsess or want to be rewarded with food.  I am not a food Nazi.  My daughter does get snacks, but you will find very little if any junk food in our house.  Her favorite snack right now is a peach and almond rice cheese crackers. I vowed when she was born, that I would teach her to eat properly and to be healthy, which is another reason why I choose to have GBS. She loves veggies and has proclaimed as of late that she is a "meatanarian" (LOL)!!!

Even though my parents were weirdos about food sometimes, I will say that from a nutritional standpoint, they were right about some things (I know this from my nutrition background). Protein, carbs, and veggies must be part of a balanced meal.  How you achieve that is up to you. If you have picky eaters, there are books that can help you "hide" foods.  I haven't had to do that yet since my kid is a good eater, but I do have a few tricks up my sleeve just in case.  My sister and I have both found ways to hide spinach in just about anything.  The funny thing is that I LOVE fresh spinach!!!

Anyway, I say all this to get you thinking: How do you view food and is food your friend... or enemy? Just some "food" for thought!!! :)